Scribble Mix Banner

Sunday, March 22, 2015

Skater's Sonata

The cut of the ice,
the turn
the spin
the lift
the whirl
the clink of the blades
cutting into solid water below
melting into a symphony
of speed and dance.

Muscles strain
to control the chords
the mind focused
directing the winds
the dance commences
harmony to percussion.

The intensity
the pain
the tear of the skate
the rink it wounds
the hours gone by
a promise of perfection
if nerves standby
the card
the ten
from every judge
a win.

I plan to let this one evolve.  It needs some editing and refinement.  I would like a little more intensity throughout the poem.  The way this currently stands I have left some things that serve as reminders for a later edit.  As an example "The card, the ten.....", I may want to include the competition originally this was about practicing.  I think I want to go the route of practicing and maybe leave something short showing that it pays off like I have done so far but I have left my opportunity to take that out or change the meaning later.

No comments:

Post a Comment